1. Accept the loss
The tendency that many have after experiencing a loss is to pretend that it didn't happen. We want to deny that what was taken from us will never be ours again. "Certainly we will get back together, right?" "I know he still loves me." "She just needs a break." "My love will realize I am the best catch out there."
While these statements may make you feel better for the moment, they certainly do not help you move past the pain and move forward in your life.
When we lose the love of another, it is best to accept that the loss has taken place and focus on how we can learn, grow, and move forward into a happier place. Futile attempts to hold on to the love will only prolong the agony of your heart break.
2. Be Kind To Yourself
It is very easy after a break up to beat yourself up. "If only I had done this… or that… perhaps we would still be together." The one being left in the relationship often takes blame and responsibility for the sorrow filled ending.
Perhaps you think that you were not attractive enough, smart enough or fun enough to be around. You begin to replay all the times in your mind that you were in a bad mood or said things that you wish you had not said. The truth is, if your relationship comes to an end - it is because it is supposed to. It goes back to that old cliché, "When one door closes, another one opens." You must remember that and get back to focusing on all of your wonderful characteristics that will make you an even better partner next time!
3. Rest, Sleep, Relax, Take It Easy
When you experience heart break, every cell in your body knows it! Did you realize that the stress from a break up can cause you to be forgetful and clumsy? It can cause you to feel fatigued and develop headaches and stomach aches.
Losing a love can be the source of anxiety - which can make your legs feel like jell-o and your arms feel weak.
When you are experiencing a heart break, take a break… get some rest, relax, breathe deeply and know that the heart, body and mind have the wonderful ability to heal naturally with a little care from you.
4. Get Moving
Now that you have taken time to rest, the next step is to get moving! Exercise can be a wonderful way to increase the level of serotonin in your brain. This "feel good" chemical is the body's natural way of increasing energy and hormones that make you feel happier.
You can go for a walk, go running, take an exercise class at the gym, practice yoga or a number of other activities that you enjoy. Why not spend time walking and talking with a friend? What better therapy is there than that?
Adopt a dog from your local animal shelter if you don't already have one. They know all about love loss… and they make wonderful exercise companions!
5. Heartbreak 911 - Call on Friends and Family
Nothing heals a broken heart better than receiving love and support from your friends and family. These people are in your life because they care about you and they see the value in you. Just talking with a close friend has been proven to lower blood pressure and put your mind at ease.
Your friends will be happy to take you out, make you laugh and forge
t all about "what's his name."
6. Write in a Journal
Writing down your feelings is the best way to get them out of your mind. By transcribing them onto a piece of paper, you will find that the thoughts no longer take up space in your head or your heart.
Write down all the things that you learned from the relationship. What are some things that you enjoyed about him/her? What were some things that you did not like? What did you learn about yourself? How will you change or stay the same in your next relationship?
7. Have Some Fun
So often when people get into relationships they stop doing the things that they enjoyed when they were single. What have you stopped doing?
Did you used to go out dancing more often? Did your significant other hate motorcycles so you stopped riding yours? Did you like to go to movies and she didn't? Take a trip that you have always wanted to take.
The worst thing you can do is stay home and host your own pity party.
Instead, go out and party doing the things that you enjoy in life. Even if you don't feel like it… go anyway! Once you get out it will be no time before a smile returns to your face and you will realize that life goes on!
8. Get Touch Therapy
The healing benefits of touch are numerous.
Massage therapy is one way to receive touch, and it helps with everything from decreasing anxiety, helping you sleep better, reducing fatigue to giving you greater energy and a sense of peace.
Giving and receiving hugs is another way to incorporate the power of touch into your life. Did you know that it is a proven fact that hugging a friend can lower your blood pressure and heart rate?
Reach out and touch someone… it just might make you both feel good!
9. Laugh A Little
We all know that laughter is the best medicine. It's the body’s natural way to relieve stress and give us a good old shot of feel good hormones and chemicals that make us happy! Studies show that people in modern society only laugh for five minutes a day. That's not enough!
Did you know that there are laughter classes opening up all over the country? It's a type of yoga that utilizes the benefits of deep breathing along with laughter to help you relax and have fun. It may sound silly to sit around with a group of strangers and laugh just for the heck of it… but why not give it a try? You might just laugh yourself silly!
10. Practice Having Faith
When we go through a break up, it's easy to think that we will never find love again. We wallow in self pity and begin to believe that our life will be full of empty, lonely days. Not true!